A Good Day

April 26, 2012
5 months & a week or so

I received my very first Mother's Day card in the mail today - along with a wonderful hand knit sweater for my boy.  Isn't amazing how timing works sometimes?  I was having one of those not-so-great Mom days.  Colter, a gem all morning long, was down for a nap but I was just dragging along attempting to cram way too much into my day.   This is standard.  Just ask CJ. 

The card was perfect.  It gave me that much needed STOP in my day to remember that I really am making a difference.  That I am accomplishing a great deal.   I even had a few tears come to my eyes.  It felt good.  The card:

On your first mother's day
Celebrate all the dreams taking shape...
All the beautiful to-be's and fun to-do's...
All the moments and imaginings big, small and extraordinary...
Celebrate all the joys in your heart,
and have a very happy mother's day.

It reminded me of how incredibly blessed and thankful I am that I get 6 days a week with my boy.  And the 7th he spends with his Papa.  I am there when he first wakes up, I am there to put him to bed and I am there for every in between (yes, even those wonderful, endless minutes of wailing upon occasion!).

Colter's new favorite past time:  anything involving his feet.  He can quite impressively chew on his toes (although only during diaper changes when the voluminous cloth diapers come off).  He grabs his feet, brings them in and giggles as he sucks and gnaws on his toes.  I wish I knew was he was thinking.  I can only imagine how amusing this must be - especially for a baby who most likely forgets that he has toes to chew on.  :-)

Toes: A convenient delicacy

The boy also loves to take off his socks.  Sometimes I really believe he is doing it just to annoy his Mama.  He'll pull and pull and then Whoop!  sock is off and straight to his mouth (can you tell someone is in an oral stage?!).  Then he'll look at me with this sly little grin almost as if saying, "What are you gonna do about that, Mom?!"  Naturally it always leads to an attack from The Tickle Monster which sends him in a fit of giggles.  These are the day to day challenges I must deal with.  Hehe ;-)

He can successfully roll from belly to back.  Both a good and a bad thing.  He can now quickly sneak out of the dreaded "Tummy Time".  This only means I have to get more creative with barriers to keep him from his beloved back - where he can then kick, screech, suck on toes, pull off socks and roll from side to side as his leisure. 

Hangin' by the Owens River, Owens Valley, CA

Colter dove into the world of food about a week ago.  The going is slow thus far.  Rice cereal and carrots (pureed, naturally) are the extent of his diet outside of breast milk.  Some nights he is hungrier than others and I am valiantly trying to find the right combo and time frame to feed him so that he will sleep through the night.  He has an 8 hour stretch but still requires a 4am feed to make it till morning.  He is intrigued with the new tastes, for the most part, and thinks it is quite fun to eat.  Who am I kidding?  Colter thinks everything is fun.  He is my happy go-lucky boy.  I love it.  It's contagious.

We took a road trip to Ridgecrest for Easter with CJ's dad and sisters.  Colter was the center of attention.  He sat in his Bumbo seat in the middle of the kitchen and loved watching everyone cook - especially since he had almost constant attention.  He best get used to the wonderful, loud nature of the Malcolm get-togethers.  I'd say he is right on track.

Watching his first Sunday morning cartoons...in his PJs!

We escaped up to Mammoth for a night and stopped by the Owens River on our way back to Ridgecrest.  It was a glorious spring afternoon:  Owen swam in his namesake, Colter giggled in the 30 mph winds, CJ skinny dipped and I.....well, I sat and counted my blessings.  But there were too many so I stopped, swooped up my boy and laughed with him as the warm wind brushed across my face.  It was a good day to be a mom.

A Good Day

The Puffer

April 4, 2012
4 months and some change

Last night, during our nightly "cuddle time", CJ presented the idea of having a bbq for the helicopter training class he is in this week:

CJ:  I was thinking of having a few people over for a bbq tomorrow.

Me: *Trying with every ounce of my being not to say no* Oh, that sounds like fun.  How many people?

CJ:  Probably around 20.  But we'll keep it really simple.  It'll be fun. (Always positive!)

Me: *Secretly squealing inside* Oh, that sounds like fun.  20 people, eh?

For the record, I don't do simple.  Not in my vocabulary.  Especially with a 4 month old.

So, this morning as I was tidying up the house in between batches of chocolate chip cookies, I managed a minute to pick up my Parents magazine.  I flipped through it and this month, well actually it is last month's, it highlights the best parenting blogs.  One of them, Ain't No Mom Jeans, was voted best fashion blog.  I briefly read the excerpt in the magazine and couldn't help but laugh.  The title? "Wear a Puffer Vest (and Hide a Poochy Stomach!!)".  I had to laugh because this is EXACTLY what I have been doing all winter.  CJ bought me this fabulous patagucci turquoise down vest for Christmas and I have been living in it.  As the blog states, "If you can find a puffer that you can juuuuuust barely zip up-that's the perfect fit for pooch training."  Love it!

The Puffer:  Every Mom's Savior

But I have a new dilemma.  Winter is no longer here.  The days are getting warmer.  And I still have a pooch.  Take for instance this coming weekend - Easter.  We are adventuring to Ridgecrest to be with the family.  It should be wonderful and warm, around 80.  As much as I love my Puffer, I think I would look a bit odd.  Even if the color is very Easter-esque.

Accordingly, this morning I decided to try on dresses.  I laid Colter on the bed and proceeded to give him his very first fashion show.  Time and time again I strutted my stuff for him and time and time again he giggled in hysterics.  I am not sure what that means for me and my pooch.  They main problem remains to be not my pooch (incredibly enough!) but my boobs.  Dresses that looked cute on me just over a year ago now manage to make me look like a dominatrix.  Certainly not appropriate for Easter with the fam.  And probably not appropriate even for a breastfed 4 month olds eyes. 

The Puffer is looking better and better....

I'm having a good day so far.  I may give my hubby crap about throwing a party last minute but, honestly, it's fun.  Living in the middle of nowhere one can easily slip into Never Never Land.  Not today.  Today we are having firefighters from San Bernardino in our home.  Is it sad that it makes me feel more worldly?!

Ultimately?  You have CJ to thank for planning a simple party for a mere 20 people so that his wife found the magazine and was inspired to write today's blog.

Reference: aintnomomjeans.com

A Day in the Life

April 2, 2012
4 months, 2 weeks

March 19, 2012: 4 months!

It takes my husband being called out on a MVA roll-over for me to sit down and type out a blog.  That is not a good thing.  But it's Spring Break time and the Canyon is rockin' and rollin' with all sorts of medical calls.  As CJ says, "It gives me a job!"  Either way, I'll say a little prayer for the people in the car.

I have been meaning to write a blog for almost a month now.  I always manage to come up with a pretty healthy list of excuses:  Colter needs to be fed, Colter needs a diaper change, Colter wants to play.....Owen needs to be fed, Owen needs to go out, Owen wants to play....CJ needs to be fed, CJ needs to....wait a minute!  ;o)  It does seem a bit trivial when I write it out - but I promise most of the time it is actually FUN to do these things. 

I thought I'd take the time to give you a sneak peak into our lives - a typical day in the Malcolm household (when CJ is working....on his days off we go crazy!).  I have learned the beauty of finding one's own rhythm.  Each day seems to morph a bit and today's norm will soon become "so last week".  Take note:  Times are an average.  They should really all say "ish" - give or take 30 minutes.

0730 CJ wakes, showers, makes some coffee and reads the Bible. Owen climbs into bed with Mama. Colter also wakes.  Colter spends quality time cooing, talking, blowing raspberries and sucking his thumb until Mama wakes at a more decent hour.

0800 CJ leaves for work (he has a lengthy .5 mile drive). Mama wakes.  Change Colter and sing some morning tunes ("Good morning, Mr. Colter" is one of our favs).  We get ready for our morning walk.

0815 We head out for our walk.  Colter in the Kelty backpack on my back and Owen sprinting ahead eager to reach the forest. 

0915 Return home from walk.  Feed Colter.  Dress Colter for the day (because it is so much nicer to still be in your warm pjs when you go walking).  Playtime with Mama:  which could consist of a variety of activities at this stage of the game.....songs, tickles, watching Mama clean the kitchen (trust me, it's fun - I am very interactive!), reading, dancing....

My little yogi

1100 Colter goes down for nap #1.  Mama checks email, facebook (oh, the shame of it!), goes through the mail, cleans house, laundry, showers, feeds Owen, prepares lunch (I like to make extravagant lunches)....really, I do anything that needs doing. 

1200 CJ comes home for lunch.  We enjoy a nice Mama-Papa lunchtime.  Throw the ball outside to Owen.

1245 Colter wakes up.  Joins us for lunch fun.

1300 CJ goes back to work.  I feed Colter.  Owen sleeps at my feet.  I strap Colter onto my chest as we clean up from lunch and then plop him in the Bob and head to the post office and sometimes the market.  Owen strolls with us. 

1500 Colter goes down for nap #2.  I pop in a workout video - focusing on my core this week.

My sleeping angel

1630 Colter wakes.  Playtime with Mama.

1700 Feed Colter.  Colter then enjoys some "independent playtime" either in his crib or on his playmat.  He gets lots of exercise swinging his arms and legs a million miles an hour.  I make dinner.

1800 CJ comes home (on a good day).  We talk, eat (Colter joins us in his Bumbo seat), feed Owen and might just enjoy some netflix action.  Most recently?  Conquering the NCIS series.  Good stuff.

1900 Bathtime for Colter (he starts to get fussy around 1845 but plop him in the bath and he is a happy little dude) followed by some hyperactive play in his diaper.  I am convinced he needs to get "it" all out of his system before he crashes for the night.

1945 Jim-jammies (aka pjs) on.  Time for reading with Mama and Papa.  Tonight?  The Tale of Tom Kitten.  Last night?  The Giving Tree.  My personal favorite?  I love you forever. Makes me sob every time. 

2000 Colter to bed.  Mama and Papa enjoy a movie and cuddles with Owen and each other (or not tonight as CJ is on call...).  CJ made a fabulous blackberry-strawberry pie last night- the whole darn thing from scratch.  INSANE.  I am so glad there are only 2 of us.

2100 I feed Colter one last time.

2200 Mama and Papa head to bed.

0430 Colter wakes and I feed him.  The past few nights I have been lingering after he finishes and savoring the quiet.  We will start feeding him soon and before I know it he will no longer need an early morning feeding.  I never thought I would say this....but it's sad.

0730 Repeat.

Tummy time today

Well, that is a day in the life.  And guess what time it is?  2100.  Suppose I should go top off the boy.  Maybe I'll go to bed early tonight.  I imagine it could be a late one for Ceeg.

One year ago today....

March 9, 2012
3 months 3 weeks

I woke up this morning, heard my boy cooing in the next room and couldn't help but smile.  A year ago today I took my very first positive pregnancy test.  In fact, I took two.  A year ago today I found out that there was life growing inside of me.  My child.  My first born.  A year ago today I remember it feeling surreal looking down at those 2 pink lines (well, one was really faint) and thinking, "Oh my God.  I have been waiting for this for years.  And here it is.  Just like that.  My life has changed forever."  A year ago today I said a prayer for a healthy pregnancy and a healthy baby.  I prayed that God would show me how to be a loving mother.  I prayed that this child would bring me a joy I couldn't begin to understand.  Today, I'd say my prayers came true. 

Peek-A-Boo!

Colter has become my little thumbsucker.  And I love it.  He wakes up in the morning or from a nap, cries for about 5 seconds (to let me know he is awake), puts his thumb in his mouth and patiently waits for Mama to come and get him.  It is splendid.  Crying has been chopped to a minimum and I firmly believe Colter is discovering the joys of lying in his crib.  I mean, goodness, who doesn't love to lie in bed in the morning?  And he has a mobile.  Pretty cool if you ask me.

Life doesn't get much better than this....

He is also my little spitter-upper.  It definately comes in waves but it seems to be more often than not.  If he wasn't growing and gaining weight I would be concerned.  But he is, so I simply carry a burp cloth with me no matter what distance I am traveling.  He seems so happy about the whole thing too which just cracks me up.  He spits up and laughs.  I don't think I've ever had regurg or vomited and then smiled.  But that's just me.

His favorite time of day?  Bath time.  He would soak in that bathtub all day long if I let him.  It is the cutest.  A waterboy just like his Papa.  I think he just likes to be naked.  'Cause anytime I undress that boy he just starts wiggling and laughing and having the grandest time.  Also like his Papa ;o)

Soaking with Papa

We recently purchased a Bumbo seat for the little man.  He can now view the world from an upright position - it does seem to cause more spit-up but, as I mentioned earlier, he doesn't seem to mind.  When I am in the kitchen, he loves to be up on the counter with me and watch me work my magic.  We have intense conversations, sing and dance.  I've determined cooking is just that much more special with someone to share it with!

Chilling with big bro Owen...and spitting up ;-)

In these few months that Colter has blessed our lives, I have learned many things.  I know for sure that change is the only constant.  One week it's this and the next it's that.  I have learned to be more flexible.  We work together as a team to come up with the perfect schedule for both of us.  I'd say it took me 3 months to come to this conclusion.   And now that I have we have had some of the greatest days together yet.  We have laughed more this past week than I have laughed in a long time.  Motherhood truly is a gift from God.

Happy to be alive!

To sum it up? A year ago today I had no idea about where I would be today.  Isn't that wonderful?!  The surprises life brings.  Keeps us on our toes.

Quiet time with Mama

Excuse me, what have you done with my baby?!

March 4, 2012
3.5 months (there are just too many weeks now!)

February 19, 2012   3 months!

My poor baby got his first cold the end of last week.  Most likely from his Mama, who went back to work one day two weeks ago and subsequently got sick.  Anywho, little Colty has been a bit under the weather the past few days with a runny nose.  Not his usual chipper, excitable self - although he did manage to crack a smile and a small laugh during diaper changes (his favoritist time of day!).  This morning he woke up and I could instantly tell a difference: laughing, kicking, talking...It was back to normal in the Malcolm household.  Happy baby, happy Mama.

And then the afternoon came.  Honestly, I have no idea what happened but all of a sudden my happy-do-lucky baby turned fussy-go-lucky.  That boy has some lungs!!!  It didn't matter what I did - rocking, singing, dancing, cuddling, reading, feeding - he just kept right on screaming for a good hour and a half.  It was a beautiful time in the Malcolm household.   I kept thinking to myself, "Who took my son?!?!" Per my husbands wisdom, I finally plopped him in the carseat, hooked it into the Bob and set off on an evening stroll.  By the time I reached CJ's office, he had finally found his thumb and was sucking happily as though nothing had ever happened.  Sigh.

My little boy is really starting to grow up.  He can successfully roll from his belly to his back (most of the time...).  He can ride in the back of the Kelty Backpack, he just loves being up nice and high.  He has definately found his voice.  He has become quite the little social bee.  He loves going to social events with us and being passed around from one set of hands to another.  And his smile!  Oh, it just melts my heart every time.  And his laugh!  I love playing the "I'm gonna get you!" game - it gets him laughing every time.

All giggles

The big debate: a righty or a lefty?  He seems to be favoring his right thumb recently (the end result after numerous pacifier rejections).  However, I get awfully excited when I see the left thumb sneak its way in.  CJ is trying to get the boy to suck on his finger versus thumb in hopes that it will spare us orthodontic bills in the future.  I figure whatever keeps him happy, so be it.  We'll start saving money for nice lookin' teeth.

Lefty!

Righty?

I have some big news!  I had to wear a belt with my pants the other day.  You can imagine how happy this made me.  Tomorrow marks day one of my 63 day INSANITY challenge.  It is similar to P90X but 63 days instead of 90.  It claims to put you in the best shape of your life.  But, then again, I am feeding two and require quite a lot of calories in one day to produce the required milk.  I am a bit hesitant that this exercise regimen might be too much.  We shall see how it goes.  Number 1 priority?  Keeping my baby healthy.

Me and my boy in Sedona

Naptime Reflections

February 11, 2012
12 weeks

Hangin' with Papa

I snuck into Colter's room while he napped.  I stood over him lovingly in awe.  I daydreamed about what he would one day become: a rock band singer? an astronaut? a teacher? a firefighter and paramedic like his papa? a nurse like his mama? I just couldn't believe that this little human that grew inside of me for 40 weeks would someday grow up.  He's so tiny....so precious...so loveable...so dependent. 

I had to bring myself out of the future (I have issues with that sometimes.....) and into the past (gotta do the extremes before I get back to the present....).  I stood there, as a new mother of merely 12 weeks and thought about how much my life has changed: sleep deprived nights, hours spent shaking toys in front of my son's face, countless breastfeeding sessions, innumerable diaper changes, a gazillion loads of laundry...dare I go on?  And then there has been the wonderful moments:  smiles, coos, laughter (a first the other day), wiggles, cuddles, discoveries....so many I fear that some have already slipped away from my mind!

Discovery

I brought myself back to the present (finally- can you believe Colter was still sleeping?  Tiny miracles).  My handsome son lay sprawled out; left hand overhead, right hand draped across his chest, legs open in a froggie position.  He graduated from his swaddle just a week ago and has since discovered the joy of sucking on his arms and fingers.  He is learning to self-soothe.  To pacify or not to pacify?  That is the question....

Hiking in Sedona 2-7-12

I realized that my shirt had spit-up on it.  I had yet to shower but felt happy knowing Owen, Colter and I had managed an hour and a half long walk earlier this morning.  I told myself over and over again, "Heather, don't forget this moment.  This is the moment you are completely at peace."   I forgot to worry about what I was going to make for dinner or whether Colter's diaper rash from the cloth diapers would ever go away.  The unfolded laundry and floors that need mopping slipped from my mind.  For a brief moment in time, looking at my son brought me all the peace I needed. 

Pensive

I quietly sneaked out of the room feeling like I was the best mom in the whole wide world.  I felt as though I was living in a sort of Utopia.  But, whadda ya know, I shut the door, took two steps down the hall and Mr. Colter started wailing.  I was drop-kicked out of my fantasy dreamland and back into reality in no time.  Yes, there was laundry and dishes and something called responsibility that I needed to address. 

In I went: picked up Mr. Fuss Ball and cradled him against my chest. He gave me a cute little smile, a burp and then some projectile spit up (which landed not only on my shirt and my pants but also on the floor).  I couldn't help but laugh.  Maybe everything about motherhood isn't perfect.  Maybe every moment isn't the greatest moment in the world.  However, I do believe there are just enough magical moments to keep me smiling from one to the next.

Thank you, Colter, for showing me a new found beauty in life.

Happy 12 weeks, Colter!

Durango

January 26, 2012
9 weeks, 5 days

Since I last wrote, Colter had his 2 month birthday!  He weighed in at 11lbs 6 oz, 23 inches long.  They grow so quickly! The newborn clothes have been packed away for quite sometime now and I find that even some 0-3 month outfits must be pulled out of the dresser as well.  We are now in the habit of having lengthy conversations - he is quite the talker!  He responds to my words with the most wonderful noises and I swear he says, "Hi!"  after I do.  He is happy as a little clam:

1-19-12...2 months!

"Super Mom" was a breakthrough day.  I confess that the day after "Super Mom", I was totally beat - annihilated, in fact.  So incredibly exhausted from the effort it took to be Super Mom for a day.  But, never the less, a few days later I regained my strength and have, since that point, been groovin' in my new found life.  It feels nice to have my sh*t together.  Pardon my french.

We decided on a road trip these past few days to one of our favorite cities, Durango.  Packing with an infant is always a daunting task:  between diapers, toys, excess of clothes (that boy is in a serious spit-up phase), carriers, a stroller....and then there's the dog.  Owen has his own bag and bed (without his "place" he is a lost little puppy).  I am incredibly thankful for our massive truck and the pop top.  Makes life just that much easier.

To my excitement, on Sunday I determined that Colter is now quite able to sit facing out in the Baby Bjorn.  His head wobbles a wee bit but he seems to thoroughly enjoy seeing the world from Mama's point of view.  He occasionally strains his head around to make sure that I am still there (even though I am pretty much constantly singing or talking to the little dude).  It must be comforting to know that your Mama's got your back ;-)

Off to Durango we went on Sunday evening.  It is a unique drive through the Res - with a stop in Kayenta at the Burger King for a chocolate shake.  Did you know that the BK in Kayenta has the world's largest Code Talker display?  Interesting fact of the day.

We found a family run hotel just a 10 minute walk outside of downtown Durango.  Simple, quaint and we had our own corner away from the other guests so that Master Colter wouldn't bother anyone.  He is down to two feedings a night for the most part.  But he does wake up :-)  I can only imagine that if I were 11.6 pounds, I would need to eat much more frequently.  But I am not.  I am a new mother in the process of working off 11.6 pounds.....hehe.

Durango is a fabulous town.  The classic downtown filled with little shops and delicious restaurants.  It snowed 1/2 foot to a foot on Monday night.  We went for a snowshoe in the storm Monday....

And woke up early and headed out for a long cross country ski Tuesday morning.  The sun was shining, the views were impeccable and the snow perfect....until it was warmed by the sun and stuck to the bottom of our skis on our way down.  Clearly, the wax job was not enough.  Every few feet we were no longer gliding but stomping.  Memorable to say the least :-)

Colter hung out on CJs chest - snoozing away.  Even if he doesn't remember these early adventures in life, I like to believe that they/we are preparing him for a life of exploration.  Setting the stage, I guess.  CJ and I patted ourselves on the back for making the effort to get out and DO.  Life is definitely different with a baby but it doesn't mean we still can't have fun.  In fact, in many ways I find it makes it more fun.  It's a challenge - and the reward is great!

A valiant attempt at a family photo :-)

Alas, Colter is calling and I must go!  'Til next time....